January 24, 2005

Tragedy to hope

Here is one adoption story sure touch anyone's heart. As someone who experienced the pain of a child passing away before coming home, I empathize with and admire Scott and Holly of Wisconsin...

My husband and I have been in the process of adopting from Guatemala since
April 2004. We were quickly referred a baby boy born August 17th and were
ecstatic to say the least. We received pictures shortly thereafter. His name was
Juan Carlos, but we called him "Brady." Brady was said to be a very healthy
baby at birth, but at two months of age started having digestive problems. He
was hospitalized a total of three times with severe diarrhea and failure to
thrive. He was diagnosed with allergic enteritis and weighed only 7 pounds at
four months in December. He was released from the hospital for the third time
the week before Christmas. We celebrated the holidays as usual, keeping Brady
in our constant thoughts and prayers, but on the morning of December 29th, my
brother-in-law (who is from Mexico and speaks fluent Spanish) came over to
call Brady's doctor and get an update on his weight. It was during that phone
call that we received the most heart-breaking news of our lives, Brady had died
earlier that morning. He passed away in his sleep and was found by his
foster father at 5:00 am. Our whole world came crashing down! We still had
presents for him under the tree, toys in his stocking, and his nursery was decorated
adorably with Care Bears. We had never seen or held him, but were very much
in love with him! He is our son and will remain in our hearts forever.

Now, the reason I'm writing...

We have a 5-year-old nephew named Noah who is VERY grown up for his age.
About twelve days after Brady died, Noah was at our house and playing with a Care
Bear phone we received as a gift for Brady. He saw Brady's picture and said,
"Brady died, didn't he?" I replied, "Yes, honey. He did." He then went on
to tell me how he missed Brady and how he talks to him at night when he says
his prayers. He said, "I talk to God before I go to sleep and since Brady's
with God now, I can talk to him, too." As he played with the toy phone, he told
me, "Holly, I'm going to ask Share Bear to tell Cheer Bear to take the
cloudmobile up to heaven and ask God to send you a new healthy baby." My heart
sank! Right then, I realized how truly blessed we are to have Noah in our lives
along with our other nieces, nephews, and loved ones. God spoke through him
that day and provided me with a sense of peace and comfort that I hadn't felt in
a while. I felt Brady's presence there with us and smiled for maybe the
first time in over a week. And wouldn't you know, the VERY next day we received a
phone call that a baby girl had been born on January 9th and was available
for adoption. We accepted the referral and with tears in our eyes we called
Noah right away to tell him God answered his prayers. He was so excited! We
believe Brady had a part in bringing our baby girl to us and will watch over her
while we are so many miles away. She was born Yanira Matilde, and we will
call her "Annaliese." She will not take the place of our beloved son, but will
be told about her brother and how she came into our lives.

Posted by Kevin at January 24, 2005 09:53 PM

Your story touched my heart in a very special way. Especially, since I just brought home my son 3 weeks ago...his name is "Brady".

Posted by: Teresa at January 25, 2005 02:14 AM

What a hopeful story. Thanks for sharing. Our first adoption was finalized in Guatemala last June. We were waiting for the pink slip when we found out the birth mother had taken her daughter out of the foster home, even after our names were on the birth certificatae, and the notorial decree was signed. They still haven't found them, and we have gotten no updates. We accepted a new referral in September. We are still in PGN and each week seems like a year. It is so very hard to wait, and not be worried to death that something will happen again. I think faith is what makes us go on and even try again. I hope your daughter, and mine, are both home very soon.

Posted by: K. at January 29, 2005 07:42 PM

We were unable to adopt our first referral because the birthmother fled the country. It was a devestating loss for us. We too had already made him so much a part of our lives. We received a referral for our son just days after losing the 1st referral, it was a bitter sweet time for us. I still think about our "first son" often and pray for him daily, but I also know that God had different plans for us, perhaps His plans including that child being in Guatemala. I can't imagine our lives without our 2 year old and know that this is how it was suppose to be. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Posted by: Amy at January 30, 2005 10:39 PM

I appreciate all of you sharing your stories. I, too, have now had a similar experience. I am in the final process of adopting my daughter from Guatemala. I was told I should expect my pink slip and be able to bring her home in the next couple of weeks. I recently visited her in Guatemala in December/2004. She is a beautiful child with a vibrant personality. I received news on February 27,2005 that the birthmother stormed the foster mom's home with two armed men and took my daughter from the foster mom. This apparently happened on February 23, 2005. There has been no sign of either of them. A new referral is immediately available for me but it is a bittersweet moment. I have learned that if the birthmother brings the child back to the foster mom, she may no longer be adoptable and my be destined to a life in the orphanage. This decision will be made by PGN and the US Embassy. If anyone has any prior experience with such an outcome, I would love to hear it. I am accepting the new referral with a provision to fight for my first daughter if she is returned.

Posted by: Christi at February 28, 2005 10:22 AM