November 27, 2013

A Thanksgiving to Remember - When did you get the call?

One of the happiest moments in our adoptions was undoubtedly the call that we were out of PGN! For us that also happens to correspond to Thanksgiving. Say what? You got the call on Turkey Day? Your agency was working on Thanksgiving? Well not exactly, read on for a cool story and why tomorrow is the 10 year anniversary of something spectacular!

As background, we were extremely fortunate during our first adoption, back before I had any adoption-community notoriety, because our agency did put us in direct contact with our daughter’s foster family (with whom we remain very close today). So we got regular e-mail and picture updates directly from them. We knew what Dr. Montiel said on a checkup before our agency did often times.

So it was Thanksgiving Day. My wife and I were just about to leave the house for the 90 minute drive to friend’s in San Francisco. I don’t know why but something possessed me at the last minute to check my e-mail (and Guatadopt probably, I was hooked at the time). Low and behold, an e-mail from our family telling us that we had exited PGN.

Turns out there was a secretary at the attorney’s office who was a little loose lipped with the foster moms. In fact, often the biggest angels in the adoption system were the “insignificant” players who used their hearts. So the secretary had told our foster family.

At the time, we had our doubts. But we had no reason not to believe them. We also knew that there was no way in hell we could ask the agency, even if by some stroke of luck we could get her on the phone. To do so could have gotten our foster mom and the office angel in trouble. So we waited the whole weekend (and Monday as I recall) to finally get the official call.

So yes, it was ten years ago tomorrow that I knew, after infertility treatments, after a failed referral, after a second referral passed away, after the Hague Fiasco I would finally be a dad!

Posted by Kevin at November 27, 2013 02:23 PM

Congratulations, great story.

I'm thinking it will take people a while to find their way back to after some of us tried every once in a while for months and found nothing new. So hang in there, and maybe get the word out elsewhere. I like the idea of sharing parenting and cultural info now, rather than heartbreaking details of our long waits as many of us did for so long!

Posted by: Reba2 at November 27, 2013 02:42 PM

Great story! I remember being in Home Depot with my husband at the very beginning of our process and watching a couple get THE CALL from their agency. I remember being in awe. My calls were not nearly as amazing- probably because we had some many "false" reports that it was hard to believe until they sent us copies of the paperwork. Thanks for sharing your story.

Posted by: Janet Renda at November 29, 2013 04:29 PM

I remember being at a neighbour's 3 year old birthday party, and watching all the kids and being so fed up so that we went home early, just in time to catch a call from our agency with pictures of our 3 day old beauty following 5 minutes later. Then all our neighbours joined us for another birthday party. That was an easy route through PGN. We had a very different experience with our second, and the exit from PGN was the day we knew for sure we would get him home, ...and the neighbours came over....He is 6 now. All the trauma of the adoption was worth all the trauma of the infertility treatments etc. I could not be without these 2 now, and I am one very grateful mom.

Posted by: Bernie at December 3, 2013 01:16 PM

Great story Kevin! And I love it that you guys are back. This time of year is both magical and nostalgic for us as well. We got the call for both our kids a couple of days after Thanksgiving and the flood of emotions that ran through me then still do even up to today as I am watching them grow into the little adults they are trying to become. Thanks for sharing your story Kevin

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2013 01:19 PM

Thanksgiving is a special day in our adoption too! Thanksgiving 2008 for us was waiting for "Pink". After a long 14 month process. Pink came the Monday after Thanksgiving, December 1st. Two months after exiting PGN, thanks to the new Renap process. One week later on Monday, December 8th, was our embassy appointment.

Posted by: Michelle at December 23, 2013 03:23 PM

We also "got out of PGN" on Thanksgiving Day 2007. We were living in Antigua at the time " fostering" our oldest son Gustavo. I'll never forget we were eating lunch at the Subway in Antigua when we got the call on our cell,we both started to ball like little babies!

Posted by: Sarah/Doug Perry at August 16, 2014 11:38 AM

I just happened to stop by and see that you are back!Yay! I got the phone call on my cell saying we were out of PGN while at lunch at In-N-Out of all places! The year was 2008, my how time has flown by us. Thank you for being there for us!

Posted by: Kathy at August 28, 2015 12:14 AM
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